What Makes You Slow Down?
A few weeks ago, Harrison and I made a quick trip out to Colorado to visit some friends and ski for a couple days. A couple days turned out to be just one for me. I fell after lunch on the first day and was out of commission for the rest of the trip. I wouldn’t describe myself as an adventurous person, but it killed me to sit there all day and not be able to ski. I’ve spent a lot of time since I fell, feeling frustrated with myself for falling and for the slowness that has come along with it. Thankfully, nothing was torn and no surgery is needed, but I am in a brace for six weeks and doing PT for a few months. Needless to say, it is not how I enjoy spending my time. In my immediate thoughts, it is all a big frustration, a hindrance and an embarrassment.
I have felt forced to wonder (because I honestly haven't been wondering, willingly) how God would like for me to take advantage of this time. I am a very scheduled person and like things to happen exactly the way I have written them out in my planner, but that hasn't been the case simply because of my knee forcing me to slow down and rest a little more. Yes, I work from home and doing my actual job is not physically demanding, but it feels as though my mind is mentally drained, as well, because of the frustrations I keep going through in my head over and over again. I’ve given myself more freedom to spend a little more time in the morning in His word and not push myself to work as quickly as normal. For the first little while, I felt lazy and guilty for doing this, but I’ve realized that He is glorified when I am learning more about Him and there is simply nothing more important I could be doing with my time. How can I continue this moving forward? Instead of taking breaks throughout the day to check on various things on the internet or do random things around the apartment, I can spend time in His word. It is so much more fulfilling and satisfying than anything else I do. This has been a time that I did not want and certainly didn’t ask for, but an incredible reminder of how important it is to be intentional in how I spend my time, even the smallest chunks of it. Granted, I was forced into this time of slowing down, but it makes me reconsider how to use my time when it is no longer forced to be slow. What is going on in your life that God could potentially be using to wave His hand at you and say, “Hey, pay a little more attention to me.”